Friday, February 19, 2016

Depression

Sometimes, I think small things will fix all my problems. Like getting away for a few days and going to another province will fix all my problems. The worst is when I get back and realize that none of my problems are fixed.

I'm still the same broken girl I was before. Mental illness isn't fixed by me going on a road trip. I spent the two days I was there lying in bed.

But I get back and real life hit me. I binged a lot and barely purged. I gained weight. My dress doesn't fit. I can't go to a show.

My boyfreind wanted to take us to a show and I bailed because I was way too fat in clothing.

I'm a terrible girlfriend. But I don't decided what triggers me,. All I wanted was to wear a pretty dress and now the night is ruined.

He's going to break up with me.

-Niqi
xoxo

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